Tips for a better nights sleep

In the last few years I have struggled with burning the candle at both ends, basically I go to bed late and wake up early. I know what you are thinking, 'just go to bed earlier'. But genuinely, I cant! I go to bed at 10pm and I won't be asleep until at least 12 or 1 (am) and then will be awake again by around 5am. I have almost become conditioned to this as I no longer really get that tired.

After years of late nights for studying (GCSE then A Level- I was studying obsessed) and waking up early to study as much as possible, I now naturally wake up early. It is almost as though the stress from exams still sits with me, months after leaving school.

I am gradually becoming less stressed and less productivity obsessed however I am still struggling to fully rest and sleep. I am convinced that the reason I cannot sleep is because my brain is used to being alert the whole time, probably down to anxiety too.

I have recently tried to improve my sleeping pattern, I am going to share with my tips:

Tips for a better nights sleep:

(Not my pic, cannot find credit- tumblr)

1) Put your phone on the other side of the room

 I know this is now a tip that has been shared for ages, but I never really listened to it and I really should have. It is so easy to lay in your bed and scroll on your phone for over an hour without even realising so seriously, put it on the other side of the room. This is a bonus because if you set an alarm then you actually have to get up to turn it off.

2) Wind down early

Don't take your makeup off, have a shower and get your pj's just before bed, make sure you are relaxed and ready at least an hour before. I personally like to be 'settled' (lol how old am I) an hour before bed so I can watch a tv programme and wind down. If I don't do this, I feel wide awake before bed- which is not helpful if you are trying to get more sleep.

(Not my pic, cannot find credit- tumblr)

3) Have a warm drink

Not everyone will relate but I hate feeling cold before bed, I just cannot get comfortable. It would probably be easier to get an extra blanket but I personally like to have a warm drink (hot chocolate or tea) before bed so that I feel warm from within- which sounds weird but is true! It helps me relax and feel cosy.

4) Prepare for the next day

If you are working the next day or have something you have to be ready for, get prepared the night before. This way, you have no stress of tomorrow in your head whilst you're trying to sleep. It is easier to to relax knowing everything is ready and having a plan, I know for sure that this helps me as I thrive off organisation.

I would love to hear any of your tips in the comments as I still do struggle to get a good nights sleep, though these tips have helped!

Ellie x

How To Keep Fit and Motivated

Keeping fit can seem like such an overwhelming task that you just want to put off because it is too much effort, well that is what I used to think anyway. And, I guess it can be. Keeping fit is something some people pour a lot of energy into, whether that be meal prepping, working out 5 times a week, organising workout routines etc.. however, try to remember that it does not have to be that complicated. The most important thing to remember, out of everything, is that healthy/fit looks different on everyone! Health does not equal being ripped or super toned, you can be fit and healthy without that too. I am no professional, but I thought I could share my personal fitness tips :)

1) Drink Water

Yes, we have heard this 100 million times before, but guess what- it really helps! Since consciously drinking more water I feel more energetic, my skin looks clearer, there are so many benefits, and of course, the more energy you have the better- right?!

2) Establish a routine

A routine sounds restrictive and regimental but again, it does not have to be. Find a routine that works for you and you can manage. I may want to work out Mondays, Wednesdays and Sundays whilst you many want to work out 3 days a week- whenever you can rather than having set days. You may want to have certain days where you do different workouts- leg day/ abs/ arms/ cardio. You need to find a routine that suits your lifestyle! There is no such thing as doing it 'wrong', exercise is very personal to you.

3) Exercise for fun!

Exercise and fun may sound like polar opposites to you however this is the problem, it should not be this way. I believe there is a form of exercise out there for everyone, you just need to find the one you enjoy. Lets say I hated going to the gym- I can workout from home, go for runs, do a fitness DVD, yoga, join a class, dance, or simply incorporate a walk into my day. Exercise need not be something dreaded. If you find a form of exercise you enjoy, it will make it a whole lot easier. I like to mix up for form of exercise I do to stop myself getting bored of it, you don't want it to become a chore! If exercise becomes something you enjoy, you will actually want to do it.

4) Balance

As with pretty much anything in life- balance is necessary. When it comes to food, your diet does play a key role in your health and fitness but this does not mean you need to cut out every piece of sugar/ junk form your diet. At the end of the day, food is food and is there to give us energy but also to be social and to enjoy! Therefore cutting out the things you love is just miserable- lets be real! So I like to know that I can enjoy any food I want, however in a sensible and balanced way. One day I may reach for an apple but one day I most certainly will reach for a chocolate bar!

I hope this post helped in some way, let me know your top tips in the comments so we can all get even more tips and guidance!

Thanks for reading,

Ellie

Simple ways to boost your self esteem

Self esteem is defined as confidence in one's own worth or abilities. 

I think many of us lack self esteem, we lack confidence in ourselves for a variety of reasons. 

It is hard to boost our self esteem, especially in the world we live in- with endless pressures and standards of perfection. We can now constantly compare ourselves to others through social media and  it is really damaging!

As this is something I am working on myself, I thought I would share some of the simple changes I have been trying to make in hope of boosting my self esteem!

1) Time out

Time out will always be unique to you, what helps me switch off will not necessarily help you switch off. However, it is not about what you do, but how it makes you feel. My time out varies all of the time, some days I colour, others I watch reality tv and sometimes I go for a walk- it changes. But the main point and purpose of my time out is exactly that- time away from my stresses and worries, switching off from work and responsibilities. I cannot explain how important this is, but by taking time to de-focus, actually strengthens your potential when it comes to focusing and therefore boosts your confidence. Since actively ensuring I have time out every day, consistently, I have become more focused and able when necessary!

2) Unfollow

Now you don't need to go and unfollow everyone on instagram, but those accounts that make you feel unworthy or make you question yourself- they need to go. It is not a personal attack on anyone but sometimes we just have our own insecurities and certain accounts worsen them, it is not mean to unfollow, its ok to be selfish sometimes. It has taken me ages to learn this but it is completely true, sometimes such a simple change can be really empowering.

3) Find Inspiration 

Now you have cleared away negativity, maybe it is time to find some inspiration! Follow accounts that share quotes that empower you, follow accounts that inspire you, follow accounts that give you joy and something to work towards. This has helped me realise my potential, seeing a positive and inspiring quote on my feed may not drastically improve my self esteem however they do help me think positively, which is in the right direction- right?!

4) Practice what you're good at

Do the things you love, and do them again. When I do something I am good at, I feel a sense of achievement. It reminds me that we all have skills and we all have our own thing that makes us unique. You may think- ' I am rubbish at everything' or ' I don't have a skill' but you do. You really do! It may be something simple or something extraordinary, it doesn't matter, it is the feeling you get once you complete something- whether that be a puzzle or a marathon.

I hope this helps you improve your self esteem, please share any of your tips with me in the comments too!

Ellie xxx

Real talk: When Anxiety Became A Trend...

I am worried that this post is going to be a bit of a rant, but at the same time, I feel passionate about this topic (as I am sure many others do) and so I feel like I need a little rant.

Anxiety is a mental illness that unfortunately affects so many people. People who suffer with anxiety and are brave enough to speak about it and share their experience with the view of helping others and ending the stigma should be supported, loved and respected. However, I have seen- several times- people being told that they are 'attention seekers', they are 'copying X' and are just 'joining a trend' when they share they have anxiety.

This deeply saddens me, not only because I know what it is like to suffer with anxiety, but because anxiety is an actual illness that affects people daily. It affects everyone differently, there is no rule book stating how everyone with anxiety feels because no universal feeling exists. After bravely sharing something so personal the last thing one needs is hate and criticism.

With the hard work of many and the pure courage of many, people are slowly breaking down stigmas attached to mental illness such as anxiety, why create yet another barrier for people ? I am sure there are many people who are afraid to share their story in fear of being accused of following a trend/making it up/exaggerating or being belittled by being told 'everyone gets anxious'.

Maybe more people than ever before have anxiety, but more people than ever before are active on social media and feel the constant pressure to meet certain standards. Social expectations seem to be constantly rising. We are used to communicating online, making it harder for people to interact socially- in *real* life. Or maybe mental illness is actually spoken about now and therefore more people realise that they are actually suffering.

I think people who are admitting that they have anxiety- or any other mental illness for that matter- should be praised. Not because mental illness should be glamourised, but because in an online world full of so much criticism, opening up can be so scary. A supportive comment could mean the world to that person.

Anxiety is not a trend, it is not 'trendy'. It is a real problem for so many.

Giving a label to a mental illness is only adding to stigma, which we do not need at all!

If you would like to read more about pressure and positivity, you can do that here.

Ellie x

Real Talk: The Power Of Makeup

Makeup is powerful- I think we all know that. Not only can makeup change the way we look but makeup can literally change the way we feel, the way we act, the way we carry ourselves and the way people perceive us. Makeup is more than products you apply to your face, but it can be a reflection of your personality or even a mask that makes you feel more 'able'.

 I love makeup, when I wear makeup I find myself feeling more confident and put together, I can choose what kind of look I want to go for that day, there are so many things I love about wearing makeup.

I see makeup as a form of art. People use makeup to express themselves, to show their individuality, to represent their passions or just to be creative. Sometimes I look at peoples makeup looks that they have shared online and I am honestly astonished by what they have been able to create.

Here is a look I created the other day, shimmery, glowy and fairly natural. I loved applying the makeup and I loved the way wearing it made me feel. I felt glowy, fresh, awake and I looked 1000% 'better' than when I was not wearing makeup. 

Would I have liked this picture without makeup? Honestly, no.

When I looked back at the picture, I realised I liked it because I liked the way my eyeshadow looked, the colour of my lipstick and my 'glow'. 

This worries me: makeup is all of the things I have mentioned, all of the positive feelings it brings and the creativity it gives. However, makeup is also controlling, obviously makeup itself does not control you but the way you feel towards it can. I find myself saying 'I need to do my makeup' 'I have to do my makeup' 'I can't because i'm not wearing makeup'.

But I don't need to, I don't have to and I can...not wearing makeup should not make us feel any less worthy or pretty or confident. 

Makeup is a choice (to an extent), but when we find ourselves saying things like ' I need to do my makeup', is it a choice anymore?

 Because I feel as though it isn't. I sometimes feel like I have to put it on in order to look acceptable. But I don't, this is so wrong!

"We should accept ourselves with and without makeup".

If you already do, that is amazing. But I know so many people don't and it saddens me, including myself.

It is hard because I genuinely love makeup, buying it and applying it, and I will continue to wear makeup, most days. But without makeup, my confidence should not drop, and it does.  I am not going to stop wearing makeup, but I am going to try and be more open to not wearing it.

I want to make sure it really is a choice and not a self imposed obligation, I want to make sure that I have enough confidence within myself to not wear makeup and still feel 'acceptable'.

I would never consider posting a picture without makeup, but why? We weren't born to wear makeup, there is nothing wrong with us without it.

Here is a makeup free selfie. The quality isn't great, there is no filter and not a scrap of makeup on my face. Do I like the picture, no- not particularly, but I think it is important to be able to accept the way we look with and without makeup, and be equally as confident.

I dont think we should all stop wearing makeup, I don't think makeup is bad at all. It is amazing that makeup gives us so much confidence, I believe makeup is a form of art and self expression.

But I do think there should be less pressure to wear makeup.

I would love for you to share with me your makeup free selfies or even just let me know your thoughts ( twitter- @_ellabellax).

Fancy some self care? Follow my pamper routine here.

Ellie x

How to deal with burnout?

When people say 'make sure you take a break, you don't want to burn out', 'you can't keep going without burning out',  'you're going to burn out', listen.

Take in what they are saying and realise that burn out is an actual thing and your mind and body cannot simply keep going without rest. And by rest, I mean switching off, allowing yourself time away from work/studying, family time, socialising, days off, not just 1 hour off an evening.

I made the mistake of keeping on and on with no proper break. From GCSE through to A Level I studied non stop. Hours and hours of work and studying, every single day. From September.

1) This was unnecessary (in the quantity I was doing it)

2) Yes I achieved good grades but I am also burnt out.

I was warned, but I didn't listen.

I am a workaholic, which in some ways is great. I am productive, motivated, determined and will always put in 110% into whatever I do. However, balance is so important. Taking a minute to gasp a breath of fresh air is essential.

I suffered from burnout for 3 months after A Levels. Why? Because I did not let my mind rest.

I studied so much that I lost what was important, I didn't think into the future, I did not spend time socialising and overall my priority was studying.

You forget to actually LIVE.

But I don't regret it because I have learnt form it. I have learnt that you have to have a balance between life and work, because it is actually counter productive to not find that balance and to work constantly.

I am slowly finding things I am passionate about, blogging being one thing, I am practising ways of relaxation and stress management. It has taken 3 months to get over, relearning that it is ok to take a break and rest and catch up on all the things you've missed out on.

Symptoms of burn out:

- Exhaustion: physically and mentally

- Feeling fed up

- Inability to concentrate on one thing

- Dreading things you used to love

- Negative thoughts

(not limited to, just some examples).

If you think you are also suffering from burn out, I want to share with you my ways of dealing with it.

 1) Don't beat yourself up for feeling this way, you cannot help it. Working hard is something to be proud of, obviously going to far and burning out is exhausting but now youve realised that you have done too much, do something about it! Speak to someone about your work load, can you cut it down? Can you manage time differently? Can you have cut off points?

2) Take time to focus on self care, your mind and body need a break. Have a bath, watch a film or a tv series, have a pamper night every night for a week. Take time to re-energise and re-focus. You may want to follow my pamper routine here.

3) Find cut off points (briefly mentioned). Promise yourself that after 5pm (for example) you will not reply to an email, you will not look over work notes, you will take time to yourself to relax- and stick to it! Cut off points are really helpful because you are recognising it is time to stop and letting yourself have time to wind down.

4) Go to bed earlier, catch up on any sleep you've missed from stress! If you normally go to bed at 12, go to bed at 11. It could make the whole world of difference, don't burn the candle at both ends.

5) Find a way to release all of your stress: running, walking, blogging, painting, drawing, going to the gym etc... Find something that makes you feel empowered, that is not working!

6) Laugh more, spend more time with family and friends- this will naturally make you feel happier, at ease and relaxed.

7) SPEAK! A problem shared is a problem halved. Bottling up your stress and emotions will make things worse and only adds more pressure and guilt. Speak to someone you trust and maybe they could even help you rest more and make sure you don't overdo it!

I really hope this helps you and you find a way to recharge and find a healthy balance!

Ellie x

6 Ways To Be More Confident

What is confidence?

"Confidence means feeling sure of yourself and your abilities"

"It is a quiet inner knowledge that you are capable"

Confidence is a beautiful thing to have, being able to say I can rather than I can't or even I will try rather than I won't. With confidence, you open yourself up to more opportunities with belief in yourself.

I want to be confident. Who wouldn't want to be confident? However, I have learnt that you cannot force confidence. You can gradually exercise confidence, but overall confidence comes with time and patience.

Now of course, to actually be confident is a lot more complex than the definition appears because there is more to it than being 'sure of yourself and your abilities'. 

With fear of coming across arrogant, fear of judgement, fear of failure, actual belief in failure and many other self doubts, being a completely confident person seems almost impossible. 

But actually, I have learnt it isn't. The book 'the life plan' taught me a lot. It taught me that confidence isn't being constantly sure, never fearful, never doubtful and never worried. Confidence is recognising you're fears, recognising the doubts, recognising the worries, but pushing through them anyway or recognising that something may be too much but you will work towards it for the future.

- Celebrating your failures because you learn from them

- Recognising your weaknesses but focusing on your strengths

- Owning your emotions 

That is confidence.

How to be more confident?

Confidence is a journey and I am gradually become more confident in myself with practice, time and self care.

There is no quick fix and of course there are so many different areas of life to be confident in.

However I can share you the simple changes that have helped me find more confidence, which hopefully help you too:

Finding your passion: this one is really important to me. Finding something that you love and you're good at is amazing, it gives you something to work on, something to be proud of. For me, my passion is blogging. When I post content, I only post what I am proud of, to me, nothing feels better than pressing publish on a post that I have worked on for hours and being excited to hear peoples thoughts! But I also have a passion for running, when I run I feel on top of the world. I feel strong, able and energised. Both running and blogging are two things I am confident in. What is your passion?

Accept yourself: this takes time, something that I think a lot of us are working on. Accepting yourself is really important, you don't have to completely love yourself (amazing if you do!!) but realising that you are who you are and accepting that is enough to make you feel more self assured. You cannot live a happy or confident life if you are constantly trying to change rather than living true to yourself!

Test your boundaries and realise what you can do: we all have a comfort zone, push that comfort zone, even the tiniest bit, and you will feel empowered. I did not think I could stay on a plane for 7 hours to NYC. But I really wanted to go to NYC. So I did it, and it has made me realise that I can get on a plane for 7 hours. What I am saying is, if you push your comfort zone and realise you CAN do something, it will open up the door to so many new opportunities, which will grow your confidence.

Hold your head high and smile more: really, it works. Do it now. Stand/sit tall, roll your shoulders back, hold your head high and smile. When we hunch our shoulders and keep our heads down it resembles feelings of insecurity and shame, reverse that, you will automatically feel 'ready'. (I don't know what for exactly, but you will haha).

Focus on what you have achieved, not what you haven't: it is so easy for us to worry on what we haven't done and what we haven't achieved and what we didn't succeed at, but what about what we have actually achieved? That is what is important. Your achievements, no matter how small, should be celebrated. The more you recognise how incredible you are and how able you are, the more you will grow as a person and flourish in confidence.

Surrounding yourself by people who make you feel more confident, not less: social media has made this one tricky. Clicking that unfollow button is sometimes essential people. Honestly. If someone is making you feel insecure or down about yourself, unfollow. It is not rude or selfish but necessary. You will find yourself a lot happier and confident once you unfollow the people who make you feel insecure.

I really hope these tips help. If you have any tips, leave them in the comments for me and others to be able to follow!

I am going to end this post with a quote that I find really inspiring:

Ellie x

You may want to read my perfect pamper night: here

Real Talk: Positivity

Positivity is a beautiful thing: to be optimistic, to celebrate achievements, to share our happiest times... I think we all want to be positive, because if you are positive you are happier, right?

It is easy to portray a positive lifestyle, to post happy quotes, to share share pictures where you are smiling, laughing and having fun, but what people don't tend to do, is to share the down moments. Now I am not saying we all need to start sharing all of our saddest moments and personal hardships, but I do think we need to be reminded of reality.

Of course, some people do share ups and downs but my point is, we often look at other people on social media and think "wow they are so happy" "their life looks amazing" "I wish I was them" "how are they so perfect"... and thoughts as such, when in reality we all have struggles and down days/weeks. Someone could be smiling on instagram and crying in real life.

When influencers get asked- how do you stay positive all the time?- their answer is often 'I don't'.

Negativity is normal. Just how positivity is normal. The difference is, we are surrounded my people 'living their best lives' which is beautiful to see, however I think we need to remember that it is ok not to be constantly living your 'best life'. In fact, it is not possible to constantly live your best life- we learn from mistakes, we grow through all the challenges we face.

I am not trying to put a downer on positivity, I love being positive, I try to turn negatives into positives and I am also more willing to share my best moments and much less willing to share my worst. But what I do want to do is highlight the fact that you should not beat yourself up for not being positive, because the pressure to constantly be happy is probably more damaging than anything else!

I hope you understand my point and that this helps you in some way.
Ellie x